The Confidence Collection: The Rise and RISE of the Middle-Aged Influencer – Why Having Confidence to Speak Your Mind Online Has Never Been More on Trend
The Confidence Collection is back! There’s not a single person on the planet who hasn’t suffered a crisis of confidence at one point or another (TRUST us!). SO, we present The Confidence Collection, (click here for our previous editions!) brought to you by our pals at Caci. We’ll be covering all areas of self-belief in all areas of life – dating, work, relationships, beauty and personal growth – with practical advice, words of wisdom from women who have seen it, lived it and conquered it, and everything in between.
In this edition, praise the Celeste Barbers of the world, we finally have social media stars in their 40s – and they’re loud, proud and fabulous! Here’s what we can learn from them, how to turn your own social media into a strong, confident and authentic personal brand, and use your life experience to its fullest potential. One thing is for sure, there’s never been a better time to be a midlife woman!
When we scroll through our social feeds there’s absolutely no escaping the joy that is being a give-zero-f’s midlife woman. Celeste Barber is parading around in yet another hilarious imitation of a whackadoo supermodel-heavy advertising campaign, UK-based, mid-40s stylist Katie Serino is explaining how to recreate celeb fits on real, curvy figures (also her takedown of the RIDICULOUS ‘chubby filter’ is more than worth watching) and NZ born Lisa Eldridge who, at 50 years old is probably the most most immaculately put together woman you will ever see online, does incredibly beautiful make-up on every age and every skin tone – using both chemist-available products and fancy ones (while spilling the tea on her celeb clients like Kate freaking Winslet!).
Gals and wahine of the 40s, 50s and 60s - it’s your time to SHINE (yup, midlife is technically defined as those between 40 and 60).
The reality of being a woman in your 40s and 50s has never been better and there have never been more reasons to be absolutely DRIPPING in confidence – the old rules have been thrown out and there is a huge range of older role models to look up to and learn from, as we get older.
Honestly, it’s an actual thing - dubbed “The Rise of the Midlife Instagrammers”, and even “The Power of the Silver Influencer” (I had to not get offended by that one because me, a peak millennial, needs to go to the hairdresser every six weeks for some reason so honestly my indignation was NOT warranted) - the online power and sway has shifted very much to favour the Xer.
THE RISE OF THE MIDLIFE INFLUENCER - WHY NOW?
The rise of social media has meant that the gatekeepers of what is considered stylish or aspirational – usually white, young and thin – have now gone. We talk a lot about the negative impacts of Instagram and the like – and God knows, there are many – but one of the absolute best things is the huge range of bodies, lifestyles and ages that we can now see reflected back at us, and the huge amounts of self-confidence they can bring.
There are a lot of assumptions when it comes to integrating ‘new things’ into social psyche - and sure, sosh meds isn’t new at all, but younger people will always be the first to adapt to technological change. What society hasn’t realised until recently is that Instagram and TikTok are experiencing massive surges in users aged over 44. Most countries in the world have ageing populations, which means a shift in what people consume, and how they do it.
And here’s a fabulous statistic for you - according to this study, women over 50 report feeling the most confident they EVER have and are, quote ‘having the times of their lives’ thanks to mature perspective shifts, a more stable environment and, quite frankly, not really giving a shit about what anyone else thinks (it’s also worth noting that the study, which sampled 1000 women in the UK, reported the 50-65’s as being *very* satisfied with their sex lives, which also might explain a few things…).
Jess Mayhew, General Manager - Head of Consumer at New Zealand PR firm Undertow Media, says that the rise of the mid-life influencer has come partly due to social media’s preference for a more realistic representation of life.
“People are over the polished, overly curated influencer vibes,” she says. “And I think what older (well, older than Gen Z!) influencers offer is real life. These guys have lived a bit, they have great perspectives and they’re not pretending that life is green juices and everything’s rosy, you know? It’s more up and down and highs and lows, and that’s appealing to an audience.
“But also, brands remember that this audience actually has spending power - there’s more money in the bank. In a cost of living crisis, this is so important. If a brand can recognise that power… then that’s a real vibe.”’
Adds leadership expert and author John Zenger, whose leadership consulting company Zenger Folkman dived into the ‘confidence gap’ between men and women, “research shows that as women’s experience increases over time, so does their confidence”. Indeed, he found that by the time women are in their 60s and beyond, female confidence appears to outstrip that of men - but while that may be both promising and interesting, it also massively highlights the potential of “significant lost opportunities in their early years, often because of fear and lack of confidence.” Who’s surprised? Ah, no one.
I mean, it makes sense - youth is wasted on the young and all that - and social media, as a reflection of our society, is finally catching up with reality.
You’ve earned your confidence through every anxiety-filled moment of self-doubt in your 20s, the indecision and pressure of your 30s and the battles that every woman still, annoyingly fights on the work, home and personal front as we navigate what it means to be a woman in this wild, increasingly loud and barrier-less world.
Kiwi mid-aged influencer, airline pilot and Caci ambassador LeeAnn Yare is an incredible example of this, with content eclectic, relevant and not-too-polished that shows her day job as a woman absolutely crushing it in a male-dominated field, as well as her sunny, happy life as a mum and content creator.
“It’s been a while coming, and is absolutely needed and craved,” she says of the rise of the mid-life influencer. “More and more Gen X women are on social media now than ever before, and we want to know and see other Gen X women doing their thing. The conversations we have are relatable because of the stage of life we are in, we’ve seen it all and done most of it, and trust others with life experience to match, because a 20-something trying to sell us on a beauty brand just isn’t cutting it.
“Audiences are wanting real women doing real stuff, juggling careers, family life, our health and wellbeing, they want our tips and tricks for everything from daily fashion ideas to creating family homes to what we feed our teens on the daily, because we have proven ourselves already - the level of trust is high. Our feeds aren’t just highly curated styled images full of designer clothing, they are genuine and real.”
So, if you’re in your midlife and want to proudly proclaim your hard-earned confidence, here’s who else to look at for inspo:
Here are some of our favourite, confidence-inspiring midlife influencers & why we – and you! - love them
If You’re Looking For Style Inspiration…
When I was scrolling through my ‘Outfits’ page on my Pinterest, I suddenly realised that all the women I had pinned were in their 40s and 50s. Actor Tracee Ellis Ross, and designer Jenna Lyons have been style icons for their entire adult lives and growing older has only strengthened their personal style. Tracee is a big advocate for colour, colour, colour, and Jenna is a big advocate for breaking down fashion rules: think sequins for daytime and denim for a fancy night out.
Katie Sturino has made a career out of creating iconic celebrity street style looks for curvier figures and did a recent video series on body image in older women, which was super illuminating in showing that for a lot of women, battling negative body image is a life-long issue – and Katie is all about teaching us that we don’t have time for that!
UK stylist Erica Davies spent a career as a fashion editor and now she is all about helping women embrace dopamine dressing – particularly as we get older. Her videos are as bright as they are informative and will help you find your personal style from the clothes you already have.
If You’re Looking For LOLS!
Two words: Celeste Barber. Even though her comedy is such a simple premise - professionally hot woman does something insane, Celeste mirrors it in her own way – it never fails to make us laugh AND love ourselves that little bit more. Truly the antidote to the body shaming and ageist world of the internet, she is a master of physical comedy and also just a wonderful all-round human.
There are about 90,000 parenting Instagram accounts out there and we cannot in good conscience recommend 99% of them, unless you’re keen to go down the Trad Wife or Wine Mom route. However, a big exception to this is Caitlin Murray of BigTime Adulting, who does some of the funniest parenting content out there but from a place of big love and dark humour (one of her three children battled Leukemia so she has BEEN THROUGH IT). Her constant refrain of ‘Here’s something you might want to know if you’ve ever thought about having kids’ always hits perfectly but she’s also extremely wise about ageing in your 40s and what a complicated blessing that can be.
If You’re Looking For Beauty Advice For 40+
The absolute OG beauty influencer, NZ born Lisa Eldridge is 50 years old and probably the most immaculately put together woman you will ever see online. BUT don’t let that put you off – not only is she a celebrity make-up artist, who works with the likes of Kate Winslet, Isabelle Rosselli and Keira Knightley, but she does incredibly beautiful make-up on every age and every skin tone – using both chemist-available products and fancy ones.
The thing all of these women have in common? There’s no boring black or fading into the background of life here. At a time of life where females are supposed to be afraid of becoming invisible to society, these women all have a totally distinctive sense of style, an unshakeable sense of self and they’ve never been more powerful. It is INCREDIBLY refreshing to see – we just need to see more of it!
And what can we learn from these wonderful women?
First off, be loud and proud. One of the privileges of ageing is the fantastic, welcome and soothing realisation that you really start to care far less about what anyone else thinks. Channel this newfound brain space and freedom into who you are, whether that’s on social media or in the real world. Always been afraid to wear colour? Girl, get yourself to the mall and buy that bright, vivid dress. Wanting to change up your hair? Now’s the time for a fresh colour and a chic new cut! You’ve been wanting to treat yourself to a little me-time, whether that’s investing in your skin, trying out new cosmetic treatments or embracing your natural beauty? Go with your gut and give something new a go, to help your outside match what you feel on the inside - whatever that might be!
Say what you truly want to say. We are officially DONE with editing ourselves to keep the peace, not enter a fray or cause a *scene* - now is the opinion era, ladies, and it’s time for you to be heard. Offering your thoughts up into the universe doesn’t mean you have to stand on your deck with a megaphone while your neighbours are mowing the lawns, or over-utilising your Instagram Live feature to offer your mundane musings of the day (my God please don’t do that, the fear of accidentally pushing an IG Live button lives within all of us) - rather, when you feel strongly about something, share your ideas, thoughts and feelings with others. You have so much value, coupled with life experience and wisdom - and social media is a natural place to be able to explore who you truly are and what you stand for.
It’s never too late to create a personal brand. Ok ok sure it might sound wanky, but as social media has risen to the forefront of finding out about a person - whether it’s professionally, socially or otherwise - it’s a chance for you to be your own billboard for who you really are. Professionally, of course, this is super-helpful when it comes to career advancement, but it’s also a fabulous place to show off the parts of yourself you love. No one is expecting the full picture of your life on social media - trust me, not even influencers do that, no matter how hard they claim otherwise - but rather, treat it like the fun highlight reel it should be, and one that proudly proclaims your own personal vibe.
